So I realized that I haven't posted in a while. Our landscaping is done, and looks pretty good. The sod out front looks fantastic! The back isn't as nice, due to weeds and patchy growth, but I'm still much happier with it than it was. Flat and fairly smooth now, except for the holes Chip has dug....grrrr.
I finally finished my super-duper compost bin today. That took me much longer than I thought, but it turned out very nice. It's too dark for pictures right now. I'll have to get some good pics of the yard and my new walkway, too.
I've been very busy with projects and getting stuff done around the house. It feels fantastic to be gardening and working in the shop again. I feel pretty great.
Sunday, June 23, 2019
Progress is being made, but it's slow
Note: I had originally started this post on May 17, but then never finished it and it's been sitting in my drafts, so I'll post as is.
Snack is all better, back to begging treats at the netting. I still need to get another tray in order to expand his new litter area. Since he has lost all his litter box habits, I can't leave him to roam around on the entire floor of the aviary like I had planned. He kept sitting on his pee pads and had bad urine burns on his hocks. So I got a giant plastic tray and filled it with litter. After his bath last weekend, I saw that his skin was looking so much better and he didn't have poop caked to his butt. So better health in exchange for slightly smaller space. It's worth the trade off. And I'll make him some shelves so he has vertical space if he wants it. He has his cardboard castle, but doesn't use it like he used to.
The major landscaping project is turning into a major pain in the butt. I thought it was a big enough project to warrant a big crew. Nope. I got two guys. Not even that, today. Today was some poor kid I'd never seen before working with nothing but a shovel. Dude must have pissed someone off. So not much progress today. It's been hot and dry (too hot!) and our dirt is so sandy and fine that the entire house, inside and out, is covered with a layer of fine dirt. It's awful. And of course my moron dog doesn't understand why he can't go play in the yard, and has been ringing his bell to go out EVERY. FUCKING. FIVE. MINUTES.
Snack is all better, back to begging treats at the netting. I still need to get another tray in order to expand his new litter area. Since he has lost all his litter box habits, I can't leave him to roam around on the entire floor of the aviary like I had planned. He kept sitting on his pee pads and had bad urine burns on his hocks. So I got a giant plastic tray and filled it with litter. After his bath last weekend, I saw that his skin was looking so much better and he didn't have poop caked to his butt. So better health in exchange for slightly smaller space. It's worth the trade off. And I'll make him some shelves so he has vertical space if he wants it. He has his cardboard castle, but doesn't use it like he used to.
The major landscaping project is turning into a major pain in the butt. I thought it was a big enough project to warrant a big crew. Nope. I got two guys. Not even that, today. Today was some poor kid I'd never seen before working with nothing but a shovel. Dude must have pissed someone off. So not much progress today. It's been hot and dry (too hot!) and our dirt is so sandy and fine that the entire house, inside and out, is covered with a layer of fine dirt. It's awful. And of course my moron dog doesn't understand why he can't go play in the yard, and has been ringing his bell to go out EVERY. FUCKING. FIVE. MINUTES.
Monday, May 6, 2019
What a shit show lately.
So things have been a bit stressful the last week or so.
1. The last eternal period left me extremely anemic. My hemoglobin is about 8 and hematocrit is around 26%. I'm exhausted, short of breath, dizzy and feel like shit. I've been taking as much iron as I can stand, but it upsets my stomach and gives me the shits. Went to the doctor last Thursday, and now I have to set up IV iron infusions. Ugh.
2. Went to Westport with crazy auntie on the 27th & 28th, and now we are buying a house together. She needs my credit rating and income for a loan. It's a super cute, but super tiny house. Very perfect for her. So I get the stress of buying a house without the fun part. The inspection was very good, though.
3. We found Snack the rabbit with his paw all tangled up in a pee pad on Sunday morning. Had likely been like that for several hours. He was stressed out and is favoring a back leg, but seems to be feeling better this morning.
4. If Chip doesn't stop chewing every goddamn thing he sees, I'm going to rip all his teeth out. And training hasn't been going very well, both because I don't feel good right now, and because he seems to have hit his teenage rebellion stage. I hate adolescent animals.
5. We have been hearing running water in the wall for a couple weeks, but haven't been able to do anything about it until this weekend. Went under the house and there's a nice pool and leak coming through the insulation. Moved the toilet and opened up the wall last night, but the leak is actually under the house. I can't get to it because of the heating pipes. Called a plumber a few minutes ago, so hopefully that will get fixed today. It's not actually causing any damage due to it's location, so at least we don't have to worry about fixing water damage. Just need to let the crawlspace dry out. Hope they send a super skinny guy, it's tight under there.
6. The massive landscaping project is supposed to start today. I'm off today and tomorrow to deal with it, because Big D had to go for a work trip all this week, which I wish I would have known BEFORE I scheduled this. He never tells me these kinds of things until last minute. If it takes longer than two days, they'll just have to bring me any problems before I leave for work.
Bonus round: I didn't hardly sleep at all last night. Coffee is brewing right now, but I don't think it will be able to carry the day.
1. The last eternal period left me extremely anemic. My hemoglobin is about 8 and hematocrit is around 26%. I'm exhausted, short of breath, dizzy and feel like shit. I've been taking as much iron as I can stand, but it upsets my stomach and gives me the shits. Went to the doctor last Thursday, and now I have to set up IV iron infusions. Ugh.
2. Went to Westport with crazy auntie on the 27th & 28th, and now we are buying a house together. She needs my credit rating and income for a loan. It's a super cute, but super tiny house. Very perfect for her. So I get the stress of buying a house without the fun part. The inspection was very good, though.
3. We found Snack the rabbit with his paw all tangled up in a pee pad on Sunday morning. Had likely been like that for several hours. He was stressed out and is favoring a back leg, but seems to be feeling better this morning.
4. If Chip doesn't stop chewing every goddamn thing he sees, I'm going to rip all his teeth out. And training hasn't been going very well, both because I don't feel good right now, and because he seems to have hit his teenage rebellion stage. I hate adolescent animals.
5. We have been hearing running water in the wall for a couple weeks, but haven't been able to do anything about it until this weekend. Went under the house and there's a nice pool and leak coming through the insulation. Moved the toilet and opened up the wall last night, but the leak is actually under the house. I can't get to it because of the heating pipes. Called a plumber a few minutes ago, so hopefully that will get fixed today. It's not actually causing any damage due to it's location, so at least we don't have to worry about fixing water damage. Just need to let the crawlspace dry out. Hope they send a super skinny guy, it's tight under there.
6. The massive landscaping project is supposed to start today. I'm off today and tomorrow to deal with it, because Big D had to go for a work trip all this week, which I wish I would have known BEFORE I scheduled this. He never tells me these kinds of things until last minute. If it takes longer than two days, they'll just have to bring me any problems before I leave for work.
Bonus round: I didn't hardly sleep at all last night. Coffee is brewing right now, but I don't think it will be able to carry the day.
Friday, April 19, 2019
Wednesday, April 17, 2019
It's over
It ended up being 33 days of heavy bleeding. Not my all time record, but the longest period I've had since 2008. I figured I am anemic due to that, and just did some bloodwork today (bonus of being a med tech!). My hemoglobin, hematocrit and iron are very bad. I have already been taking double my usual dose of iron, but it was not enough to keep up. My body just can't make blood cells that fast. My friend at work is going to bring me some of the iron supplement she uses; says it's much better than the normal vitamin pills. Can't remember what she called it.
Hemoglobin of 8.6 does explain why I have been so wiped out and exhausted for the last week. I haven't been playing with Chip as much as I should be, because I can barely get out of bed, then go lay down on the couch until it's time to go to work. I'm pale and limp, ha!
We finally got all three landscaping quotes in, and the work is supposed to start on May 6. It's a giant, expensive project, but needs to be done, badly. Chip has found some kind of buried motherlode of trash and keeps bringing disgusting things to chew on. I'm afraid he's going to get sick!
I work again this weekend, second time this month. I have my boot at work still in case I need it. My foot seems to have hit a plateau in terms of getting better. It's not bad, really. Much better than before the surgery. I just need to remember my stretches and exercises.
Next weekend should be interesting. Crazy auntie has a contract on her house now, and is coming to look at places to buy in Westport/Grayland/Ocean Shores area. Chip and I are going to go stay the weekend with her in Westport. I think Chip should be well enough behaved for a hotel visit. But now crazy auntie is saying that it's more likely that she'll be buying a trailer and staying with us for a while. I'm ok with that, but we'll need to get an RV hook up set up. Big D and I have talked about it before, but just in general terms. Now that it's not only likely, but soon, we need to sit down and hash some details out. But I don't see my husband hardly at all. It's really starting to get to me.
Hemoglobin of 8.6 does explain why I have been so wiped out and exhausted for the last week. I haven't been playing with Chip as much as I should be, because I can barely get out of bed, then go lay down on the couch until it's time to go to work. I'm pale and limp, ha!
We finally got all three landscaping quotes in, and the work is supposed to start on May 6. It's a giant, expensive project, but needs to be done, badly. Chip has found some kind of buried motherlode of trash and keeps bringing disgusting things to chew on. I'm afraid he's going to get sick!
I work again this weekend, second time this month. I have my boot at work still in case I need it. My foot seems to have hit a plateau in terms of getting better. It's not bad, really. Much better than before the surgery. I just need to remember my stretches and exercises.
Next weekend should be interesting. Crazy auntie has a contract on her house now, and is coming to look at places to buy in Westport/Grayland/Ocean Shores area. Chip and I are going to go stay the weekend with her in Westport. I think Chip should be well enough behaved for a hotel visit. But now crazy auntie is saying that it's more likely that she'll be buying a trailer and staying with us for a while. I'm ok with that, but we'll need to get an RV hook up set up. Big D and I have talked about it before, but just in general terms. Now that it's not only likely, but soon, we need to sit down and hash some details out. But I don't see my husband hardly at all. It's really starting to get to me.
Tuesday, April 2, 2019
Tuesday, March 26, 2019
Spoke too soon
Most of last week was surprisingly low pain from work, but that all went out the window on Saturday. From 4 to 7:30 on Saturday, I was alone in the lab, and our biggest drop of the day comes just as the other person is leaving, so it's super busy and non-stop. I was in so much pain by the time I went home, and my foot was very swollen and tender. It was still swollen on Sunday, and I wasn't able to do much. Went in for my PT appointment on Monday, and the therapist actually wanted me to call in to work, because it was still so swollen and painful. I ended up putting my boot on an hour after I got to work, and after that it was fine. So I'm in my boot again today, which is awkward and clumsy, but not painful, so it's what I have to deal with right now. It hurts, but hopefully with ice and as much rest as I can manage, it will be back to where it was.
We've had some landscapers come and give us estimates on redoing our lawn, as well as several related projects. It's going to be very expensive. Might have to break it up and do part of it next year. I don't actually know how much Big D has saved up for this project, but the lawn part of it really needs to be done. It's much too bad for us to do by hand; it needs serious equipment.
I'm on day 19 of this horrible, messy, disgusting, clotty period. The last day has finally lightened up on the flow, so hopefully I'm almost done. But by then it will be time for my next cycle to start? Not sure how badly my hormones are messed up. Don't even know what has caused the problem in the first place.
In better news, my mental state has improved by leaps and bounds since the beginning of January. Lexapro and Chip have made a massive difference. It's spring, and I'm actually getting interested in planting and gardening again, and thinking about getting back into the shop. I think Chip will make a good shop dog! He's not scared of loud noises much, and is easily soothed into trusting my judgement on things.
He's such a good puppy. We've been doing some heavy-duty training the last couple days and he's doing really well. The only serious behavior problem we are still having is chasing the cats, trying to get them to play. We're going to try and get that sorted out very quickly.
I should probably get back to work now, stuff is needing attention.
I wonder if Big D has found this journal yet? If so, Hi, cutie! I love you tremendously, and wish we could spend more time together.
We've had some landscapers come and give us estimates on redoing our lawn, as well as several related projects. It's going to be very expensive. Might have to break it up and do part of it next year. I don't actually know how much Big D has saved up for this project, but the lawn part of it really needs to be done. It's much too bad for us to do by hand; it needs serious equipment.
I'm on day 19 of this horrible, messy, disgusting, clotty period. The last day has finally lightened up on the flow, so hopefully I'm almost done. But by then it will be time for my next cycle to start? Not sure how badly my hormones are messed up. Don't even know what has caused the problem in the first place.
In better news, my mental state has improved by leaps and bounds since the beginning of January. Lexapro and Chip have made a massive difference. It's spring, and I'm actually getting interested in planting and gardening again, and thinking about getting back into the shop. I think Chip will make a good shop dog! He's not scared of loud noises much, and is easily soothed into trusting my judgement on things.
He's such a good puppy. We've been doing some heavy-duty training the last couple days and he's doing really well. The only serious behavior problem we are still having is chasing the cats, trying to get them to play. We're going to try and get that sorted out very quickly.
I should probably get back to work now, stuff is needing attention.
I wonder if Big D has found this journal yet? If so, Hi, cutie! I love you tremendously, and wish we could spend more time together.
Tuesday, March 19, 2019
Not too bad!
My first shift back at work is 3/4 over, and I'm doing pretty good. My foot doesn't hurt nearly as much as I thought it would. Being on the easy bench helps, as does the Tylenol/ibuprofen combo that I've been super vigilant about. I thought I might have some problems with remembering how to do things, but it's been like wearing a pair of old jeans. Easy and comfortable! It's so nice to see my co-workers. There was a cheesecake and home made cookies in my honor :)
I miss my new puppy, though. I hope he's not been throwing a tantrum this whole time. I'll play with him for a bit when I get home, and possibly even go for a short walk, depending on the pain level. I didn't get to see Harpo yesterday, either, because my PT appointment was so late. I did dishes with my spare time today, so maybe I can get the bird out for at least a little bit tomorrow.
Another professional training session with Chip on Thursday morning. He's been doing really well, even though I haven't spent as much training time with him the last few days as I should. We did a bit before work today, though, and I'll do some more tonight.
Good to be back at work, even though I'm not getting paid for it yet, because my payroll account has been disabled! My boss forgot to notify HR that I'd be back today, so I can't clock in or sign in to do my online training. I already waded through 2 months worth of emails, which weren't too bad. Hopefully the HR thing will be fixed soon and I won't miss this paycheck. I've lost track of paydays, so I'll have to look that up again. I did ok with the short term disability payments, even though I got shorted 2 weeks worth. It wasn't worth the hassle of getting the paperwork fixed. The way this company does it's STD payments is ridiculous and cumbersome. It will be nice having a paycheck again, because my credit card balance is getting pretty high.
I miss my new puppy, though. I hope he's not been throwing a tantrum this whole time. I'll play with him for a bit when I get home, and possibly even go for a short walk, depending on the pain level. I didn't get to see Harpo yesterday, either, because my PT appointment was so late. I did dishes with my spare time today, so maybe I can get the bird out for at least a little bit tomorrow.
Another professional training session with Chip on Thursday morning. He's been doing really well, even though I haven't spent as much training time with him the last few days as I should. We did a bit before work today, though, and I'll do some more tonight.
Good to be back at work, even though I'm not getting paid for it yet, because my payroll account has been disabled! My boss forgot to notify HR that I'd be back today, so I can't clock in or sign in to do my online training. I already waded through 2 months worth of emails, which weren't too bad. Hopefully the HR thing will be fixed soon and I won't miss this paycheck. I've lost track of paydays, so I'll have to look that up again. I did ok with the short term disability payments, even though I got shorted 2 weeks worth. It wasn't worth the hassle of getting the paperwork fixed. The way this company does it's STD payments is ridiculous and cumbersome. It will be nice having a paycheck again, because my credit card balance is getting pretty high.
Sunday, March 17, 2019
Almost time!
Only one day left before I go back to work. Both looking forward to it, because I love what I do and miss my coworkers, and dreading it, because it is going to cause me a lot of pain for a while. It doesn't help that I hurt my back yesterday while getting dressed. Getting old when just putting on my underwear pulls a muscle... It's not too bad, and I started icing it right away, but it is just another thing to worry about.
Just like dealing with this current period is driving me nuts. Day 10, and it's getting heavier by the day. I'm afraid it's going to start resembling my periods when I had PCOS. No idea if it's age related or due to the Lexapro? Or PCOS again? God, I hope not.
Chip is doing pretty well with training. He's finally gotten used to being crated and no longer throws massive tantrums. Obedience training is going well, but potty training still needs to be worked on. He doesn't let us know when he has to go, so we are going to try the bell method. Just hung it up today, we'll see how it goes. Otherwise, he really is an amazing dog.
Took him to an off leash beach on Friday. It was a long drive, but it was worth it. We had such a great day, and I think the long drive helped him like the car better.
He had no idea what to do with the water. He was too busy saying hi to all the people and other dogs there that he didn't get into anything disgusting. I was so proud of him because his recall was very good, even from very far away.
It's a nice, sandy beach which is kind of rare around here. I checked his paws afterwards, but didn't have to worry about them getting all cut up by barnacles on the rocks like most beaches here.
I have to keep him tethered in the truck, because he tries to crawl into my lap otherwise. With his tether on, he can reach my shoulder.
He also likes to rest his head behind my neck. At least it's out of the way and doesn't interfere with driving.
We tried to go to the local dog park today, but the trail to get there was just a giant mud hole, so we tried a different park about 20 mins from home. It was nice, and very full of happy puppies. Chip does so well at the park! He loves the people and the dogs equally, and plays very well.
In other animal news, I suspect Dinah has a UTI. She's been incontinent in her sleep a few times, and has been peeing outside of the litter box. She's got meds, so we'll see if it improves. Big D thinks it's an attitude towards the new dog, which part of it might be, but I see other signs that indicate a UTI. While we were there, we did some basic bloodwork to check on her kidney function. It's gotten a little worse since July, and she's lost over a pound. Going to see if supplementing her with wet food will help get some weight back on her. But she's 18, and a decline is inevitable. Not happy about it.
Not much else going on. Foot therapy is going well, and I can see improvement, but suddenly going back to standing on it for a full shift is going to be miserable.
Also just found out that my crazy auntie finally sold her house in IL. Now she needs to decide if she's going to come live here, probably in a trailer next to the house, or if she's going to stay in IL.
I made this collage of all the critters. Might set it as my profile pic.
Just like dealing with this current period is driving me nuts. Day 10, and it's getting heavier by the day. I'm afraid it's going to start resembling my periods when I had PCOS. No idea if it's age related or due to the Lexapro? Or PCOS again? God, I hope not.
Chip is doing pretty well with training. He's finally gotten used to being crated and no longer throws massive tantrums. Obedience training is going well, but potty training still needs to be worked on. He doesn't let us know when he has to go, so we are going to try the bell method. Just hung it up today, we'll see how it goes. Otherwise, he really is an amazing dog.
Took him to an off leash beach on Friday. It was a long drive, but it was worth it. We had such a great day, and I think the long drive helped him like the car better.
He had no idea what to do with the water. He was too busy saying hi to all the people and other dogs there that he didn't get into anything disgusting. I was so proud of him because his recall was very good, even from very far away.
I have to keep him tethered in the truck, because he tries to crawl into my lap otherwise. With his tether on, he can reach my shoulder.
We tried to go to the local dog park today, but the trail to get there was just a giant mud hole, so we tried a different park about 20 mins from home. It was nice, and very full of happy puppies. Chip does so well at the park! He loves the people and the dogs equally, and plays very well.
In other animal news, I suspect Dinah has a UTI. She's been incontinent in her sleep a few times, and has been peeing outside of the litter box. She's got meds, so we'll see if it improves. Big D thinks it's an attitude towards the new dog, which part of it might be, but I see other signs that indicate a UTI. While we were there, we did some basic bloodwork to check on her kidney function. It's gotten a little worse since July, and she's lost over a pound. Going to see if supplementing her with wet food will help get some weight back on her. But she's 18, and a decline is inevitable. Not happy about it.
Not much else going on. Foot therapy is going well, and I can see improvement, but suddenly going back to standing on it for a full shift is going to be miserable.
Also just found out that my crazy auntie finally sold her house in IL. Now she needs to decide if she's going to come live here, probably in a trailer next to the house, or if she's going to stay in IL.
I made this collage of all the critters. Might set it as my profile pic.
And just because he's cute, here's another of Chip with his new jolly ball yesterday.
Tuesday, March 5, 2019
Repeat after me: He's just a puppy, he's just a puppy
Oh, boy, what did I get myself into? No regrets, but now I remember what puppyhood is like, and I still don't like it. Chip really is a good dog, and he'll be a GREAT dog once he's grown up and trained.
The list of destroyed items grows daily. And my patience is thin the last few days. I'm cramping, but period is late. So I get some of the pain without anything to show for it.
Foot therapy is going pretty well. I've been limping for so long that my ankle and leg are all screwed up, so now that I can mostly walk properly, everything I haven't been using hurts.
To counteract the bad vibes of puppy ownership, here's some glamour shots I took the other day. He's lucky he's so adorable!
The list of destroyed items grows daily. And my patience is thin the last few days. I'm cramping, but period is late. So I get some of the pain without anything to show for it.
Foot therapy is going pretty well. I've been limping for so long that my ankle and leg are all screwed up, so now that I can mostly walk properly, everything I haven't been using hurts.
To counteract the bad vibes of puppy ownership, here's some glamour shots I took the other day. He's lucky he's so adorable!
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| He needs shades! |
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| I did a little filter on this one. My favorite so far. You can really see his eye color difference. |
Thursday, February 28, 2019
Puppies are fun...
Not! Although he is a really good boy, Chip has had NO training, and he still puppy bites very hard. Also, the destruction tally is currently at one shoe, and one glass jar.
Training is going pretty well, except trying to get him to stay in his crate while I leave the house was a disaster yesterday. So we are going back to very basics. Also, we need to stop this incipient separation anxiety before it starts.
At least I have something to do! He at least knows his name now.
Saw the podiatrist yesterday. I am now officially out of the boot, and he's pretty happy with my progress. I am making a point to do all my physical therapy at home, otherwise I will be in a world of hurt when I go back to work.
Finally heard Chip bark yesterday. He desperately wants to play with grouchy old Dinah, and thinks that barking at her while she stares him down will do the trick. He'll probably end up with a nice scar on his nose for his troubles.
I just need to remember my patience, and that it's not his fault he's a big dumb puppy. He'll grow out of it.
Training is going pretty well, except trying to get him to stay in his crate while I leave the house was a disaster yesterday. So we are going back to very basics. Also, we need to stop this incipient separation anxiety before it starts.
At least I have something to do! He at least knows his name now.
Saw the podiatrist yesterday. I am now officially out of the boot, and he's pretty happy with my progress. I am making a point to do all my physical therapy at home, otherwise I will be in a world of hurt when I go back to work.
Finally heard Chip bark yesterday. He desperately wants to play with grouchy old Dinah, and thinks that barking at her while she stares him down will do the trick. He'll probably end up with a nice scar on his nose for his troubles.
I just need to remember my patience, and that it's not his fault he's a big dumb puppy. He'll grow out of it.
Tuesday, February 26, 2019
I'm in love
with my husband. And also my new dog. DOG!!! We went on Saturday to go find a new canine companion, since it's been lonely without a dog in the house any more. It's been 3 months since Kota died, and I've been ready for a couple weeks.
Despite having a list of at least 4 shelters to go look at, we adopted the first dog we saw.
Meet Chip! He's almost perfect.
His first few minutes home.
He's listed as a heeler mix. His original shelter in eastern WA listed him as a bully/heeler mix, but the local shelter just put heeler mix. I think I see some lab and/or mastiff in him. He's currently about 6 mos old, and 45 pounds. His paws and head are gigantic! For some reason, I was picturing a small, female dog as my next pick, but this guy is wonderful! He needs training, of course. He is a bit younger than I really wanted, but he'll grow out of that! (Ha!) Most of his minor behavior issues are just because he's young. And he was just neutered.
I've spent more time outside in the backyard in the last 3 days than I have since November.
I am over the moon.
Despite having a list of at least 4 shelters to go look at, we adopted the first dog we saw.
Meet Chip! He's almost perfect.
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| Learning to chew on a rawhide. |
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| Shelby seems to like him. |
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| Attempting to fit into Kota's old bed. Tight squeeze! |
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| Directly after his first bath! |
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| I don't think he likes it here, doesn't look comfortable! |
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| The shelter said he wasn't snuggly. |
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| "Watching TV" zzzzzzzzz |
He's listed as a heeler mix. His original shelter in eastern WA listed him as a bully/heeler mix, but the local shelter just put heeler mix. I think I see some lab and/or mastiff in him. He's currently about 6 mos old, and 45 pounds. His paws and head are gigantic! For some reason, I was picturing a small, female dog as my next pick, but this guy is wonderful! He needs training, of course. He is a bit younger than I really wanted, but he'll grow out of that! (Ha!) Most of his minor behavior issues are just because he's young. And he was just neutered.
I've spent more time outside in the backyard in the last 3 days than I have since November.
I am over the moon.
Saturday, February 16, 2019
Friday, February 15, 2019
I escaped!
Actually left the house by myself today for the first time in a month. Driving was fine. Getting in and out of the truck, negotiating icy parking lots and wearing shoes were not so great. Managed 3 of my 4 planned stops, though, so I guess I did ok.
My truck is now titled and in the correct name, too.
Foot hurt badly enough when I got home that I haven't done anything else today that I wanted to do. Except put the extra support back under the sagging patio roof.
Ah, well.
My truck is now titled and in the correct name, too.
Foot hurt badly enough when I got home that I haven't done anything else today that I wanted to do. Except put the extra support back under the sagging patio roof.
Ah, well.
Thursday, February 14, 2019
FREEDOM!!!
I can finally drive! Which means I am no longer trapped in the house. I am definitely starting to go stir crazy. It doesn't help that yesterday and today the damn bird has been screaming his head off like a banshee. Yesterday was just a complete shit day, for many reasons, but that was one of them. Had to go take a nap with earplugs and a pillow over my head just for some relief from the noise.
I have my first PT appointment on Monday. I waited until I knew whether I could drive or not before making an appointment, but it wouldn't have mattered, because getting out of the driveway before yesterday wasn't happening. It's still a mess of several inches of slush and ice in our cul de sac. Once you get out to the main road, everything's fine, but getting there is questionable. I'd be tempted to call a private plow in just for our short little road, if I even knew where to call.
I have a long list of errands to run, but don't feel like going out today. Just getting paperwork ready for now.
I've been feeling very unfocused the last few days. Don't know if it's boredom or a side effect of the Lexapro. Can't keep my attention on anything for very long. I've tried reading, movies, games. Did a little bit of house cleaning yesterday; that made me feel a little better. I keep making a list of things to do at night while I'm going to sleep, then when I get up my motivation vanishes like smoke. Some of it is that I just can't follow through on things because my foot starts really hurting halfway through.
I have my first PT appointment on Monday. I waited until I knew whether I could drive or not before making an appointment, but it wouldn't have mattered, because getting out of the driveway before yesterday wasn't happening. It's still a mess of several inches of slush and ice in our cul de sac. Once you get out to the main road, everything's fine, but getting there is questionable. I'd be tempted to call a private plow in just for our short little road, if I even knew where to call.
I have a long list of errands to run, but don't feel like going out today. Just getting paperwork ready for now.
I've been feeling very unfocused the last few days. Don't know if it's boredom or a side effect of the Lexapro. Can't keep my attention on anything for very long. I've tried reading, movies, games. Did a little bit of house cleaning yesterday; that made me feel a little better. I keep making a list of things to do at night while I'm going to sleep, then when I get up my motivation vanishes like smoke. Some of it is that I just can't follow through on things because my foot starts really hurting halfway through.
Tuesday, February 12, 2019
Snowmageddon 2019 continues
When we moved into the house last year, we saw that the patio roof was missing a support. No big deal, it's a light metal roof. I looked for supports, but couldn't find one that matched, and let the matter drop. Well, that was a bad decision. Big D woke me up today by telling me that if I heard a loud crash, it was the patio roof collapsing.
Took the pics after we had put the wood post supporting the missing section. The aluminum I-beam completely folded, so will likely have to remove and replace instead of just repairing. There's a LOT of snow on it, and now it's started raining, so it's super wet and heavy. The entire region has just been shut down for nearly a week now. Thankfully, we haven't lost power at all, yet, because if we do for any length of time, we are pretty screwed. No heat, no cooking, no WATER, because our well pump won't work.
Here's a pic Big D took as he was braving the ladder to try and get as much snow off the roof as possible:
My hero! I'm pretty much useless right now. Although I am able to walk around the house without my boot on pretty well, I can't stay on the foot for long. My stitches came out last week, but the incision isn't healing all that well and looks nasty. It's not closing up. I think I'll be able to drive now, except that I can't even try and start the truck until most of the snow is gone. I'm supposed to be going to physical therapy, but I don't want to make appointments until I know how mobile I'll be. And since I have to do PT, it looks like I won't be able to make a trip to IL. I'm disappointed, because it would be fun to hang around with crazy auntie for a week or so.
Mentally, I'm doing pretty well. The Lexapro is definitely working, and I told the doctor that I'd like to stay on the 10 mg for now. Once I'm back at work, we'll see if I need to up the dosage, but I should give the 10 mg some time to fully kick in before I start tweaking dosage. I feel more like myself than I have in almost a year, so that's something. It's not all roses, but it's enough for now.
Took the pics after we had put the wood post supporting the missing section. The aluminum I-beam completely folded, so will likely have to remove and replace instead of just repairing. There's a LOT of snow on it, and now it's started raining, so it's super wet and heavy. The entire region has just been shut down for nearly a week now. Thankfully, we haven't lost power at all, yet, because if we do for any length of time, we are pretty screwed. No heat, no cooking, no WATER, because our well pump won't work.
Here's a pic Big D took as he was braving the ladder to try and get as much snow off the roof as possible:
My hero! I'm pretty much useless right now. Although I am able to walk around the house without my boot on pretty well, I can't stay on the foot for long. My stitches came out last week, but the incision isn't healing all that well and looks nasty. It's not closing up. I think I'll be able to drive now, except that I can't even try and start the truck until most of the snow is gone. I'm supposed to be going to physical therapy, but I don't want to make appointments until I know how mobile I'll be. And since I have to do PT, it looks like I won't be able to make a trip to IL. I'm disappointed, because it would be fun to hang around with crazy auntie for a week or so.
Mentally, I'm doing pretty well. The Lexapro is definitely working, and I told the doctor that I'd like to stay on the 10 mg for now. Once I'm back at work, we'll see if I need to up the dosage, but I should give the 10 mg some time to fully kick in before I start tweaking dosage. I feel more like myself than I have in almost a year, so that's something. It's not all roses, but it's enough for now.
Monday, February 4, 2019
Snow!!
And I get to enjoy it, because I don't have to step foot out in it! :)
I was supposed to go get my stitches out today, but the office called to reschedule. So hopefully we'll be able to get out of the driveway by Wednesday afternoon.
I would still like to go to IL for at least a week or two. The polar vortex crap is over, so I shouldn't regret a visit to Chicago in the middle of winter too badly...
Not being able to leave the house when I want is seriously starting to get on my nerves. There's a lot of errands I could be running, but since I can't drive yet, I'm stuck. And Big D's schedule sucks green donkey dick.
Also, the period finally showed up, about 8 days late. I'm very confused.
I was supposed to go get my stitches out today, but the office called to reschedule. So hopefully we'll be able to get out of the driveway by Wednesday afternoon.
I would still like to go to IL for at least a week or two. The polar vortex crap is over, so I shouldn't regret a visit to Chicago in the middle of winter too badly...
Not being able to leave the house when I want is seriously starting to get on my nerves. There's a lot of errands I could be running, but since I can't drive yet, I'm stuck. And Big D's schedule sucks green donkey dick.
Also, the period finally showed up, about 8 days late. I'm very confused.
Monday, January 28, 2019
Forgot to add
I found a really cool coloring app for the phone that does a very good job of simulating real crayons and paints.
Here's a few that I did:
Here's a few that I did:
In a leg trap
I went to the doctor for another post-op appointment on Friday, and I'm not healing quite as fast as I could be, so he wasn't able to take the stitches out. I have another appointment next Monday, hopefully he'll be able to take them out then. It didn't help that I fell on the way out of the house and busted open the scab on the incision. Hurt like a bitch, I was actually worried that I had torn some stitches loose. He wants me to put more weight on my heel, so he put me into a walking boot. The MA who fit the boot gave me one that's really too big. This thing is a monster, and weighs about a thousand pounds!
It really does make me more mobile, but it seriously hurts the entire time I'm walking in it. It hurts enough that I'm worried about it not healing properly and hurting like that forever. I've still only used about half my pain meds, but I don't like taking them. Tylenol is enough to keep the general pain down, but not enough to deal with the pain that comes from actually putting weight on the whole foot. It's making me not move around much at all, now, but I'm wearing the boot like I'm supposed to be.
There's a really impressive bruise on the bottom of my foot:
And the boot is just plain uncomfortable. It's hot, heavy, bulky. Makes me cranky.
Also cranky that my period is late. Due to Lexapro, surgery, stress? Dunno. Will probably surprise me in the middle of the night and make a mess.
I'm just bitchy about the fact that it's only been two weeks since my surgery, and I still have 6 weeks to go. Going to lose my mind.
Dinah the Maine Coon has become very, VERY clingy and has passed the status of Velcro cat into Superglue cat. It's really nice to have her in my lap while I'm on the couch, but she wants to be directly in front of my face, and won't even stay off long enough for me to stand up.
Three weeks on Lexapro, and I feel like it's starting to help. Might just be the lack of having to go to work and being able to laze around. But lazing around has been messing up my sleep schedule. I tend to fall asleep on the couch during the day.
Ok, Tylenol should have started working by now, hopefully I can get up and go do the dishes. I feel really guilty being home and not doing anything useful :(
It really does make me more mobile, but it seriously hurts the entire time I'm walking in it. It hurts enough that I'm worried about it not healing properly and hurting like that forever. I've still only used about half my pain meds, but I don't like taking them. Tylenol is enough to keep the general pain down, but not enough to deal with the pain that comes from actually putting weight on the whole foot. It's making me not move around much at all, now, but I'm wearing the boot like I'm supposed to be.
There's a really impressive bruise on the bottom of my foot:
And the boot is just plain uncomfortable. It's hot, heavy, bulky. Makes me cranky.
Also cranky that my period is late. Due to Lexapro, surgery, stress? Dunno. Will probably surprise me in the middle of the night and make a mess.
I'm just bitchy about the fact that it's only been two weeks since my surgery, and I still have 6 weeks to go. Going to lose my mind.
Dinah the Maine Coon has become very, VERY clingy and has passed the status of Velcro cat into Superglue cat. It's really nice to have her in my lap while I'm on the couch, but she wants to be directly in front of my face, and won't even stay off long enough for me to stand up.
Three weeks on Lexapro, and I feel like it's starting to help. Might just be the lack of having to go to work and being able to laze around. But lazing around has been messing up my sleep schedule. I tend to fall asleep on the couch during the day.
Ok, Tylenol should have started working by now, hopefully I can get up and go do the dishes. I feel really guilty being home and not doing anything useful :(
Thursday, January 24, 2019
Terrorism
Why do I have to negotiate with my cat in order to have space in an empty, KING SIZED bed!?!
Also testing the post by email feature.
Monday, January 21, 2019
Feeling better
It seems I may be past the worst of the initial side effects. Haven't had any nausea in a few days, and I don't feel fuzzyheaded. But Friday was ridiculous. I spent all day in bed. And by all day, I mean about 30 hours, only getting up a couple times for pills and peeing. Maybe that's what I needed, because I felt much better on Saturday. I'm hoping that I see some real benefits soon.
My friend Geekboy took me to a movie yesterday, which was really nice to get out of the house, but man, did that tire me out scooting all over the mall. Was out of the house for about 5 hours, and felt like I had gone to the gym for a massive workout. My left leg is going to have thighs of steel by the time I recover. I am able to put a decent amount of weight on the left foot, but it has to go on my toes. Putting any stress on the heel is still too painful. Took a shower on Saturday and redid the bandaging. It was the first time I had seen the incision, and it looks gnarly. Lots of stitches!
Gross foot picture!!!
It's only been a week, and I am rather bored at home. Maybe now that I can concentrate on something for more than a few minutes I can play some games. Sitting at the computer for a decent gaming session might still be out, so I think I'll have use my laptop from the couch. My foot starts swelling up and hurting if it isn't propped up.
My friend Geekboy took me to a movie yesterday, which was really nice to get out of the house, but man, did that tire me out scooting all over the mall. Was out of the house for about 5 hours, and felt like I had gone to the gym for a massive workout. My left leg is going to have thighs of steel by the time I recover. I am able to put a decent amount of weight on the left foot, but it has to go on my toes. Putting any stress on the heel is still too painful. Took a shower on Saturday and redid the bandaging. It was the first time I had seen the incision, and it looks gnarly. Lots of stitches!
Gross foot picture!!!
It's only been a week, and I am rather bored at home. Maybe now that I can concentrate on something for more than a few minutes I can play some games. Sitting at the computer for a decent gaming session might still be out, so I think I'll have use my laptop from the couch. My foot starts swelling up and hurting if it isn't propped up.
Wednesday, January 16, 2019
Scoot, Scoot, Muthafuckah!
So my foot is all cut up, and I'm home and bored already. I have this ridiculous little knee scooter that I can zoom around on, which is good, because I suck at using the crutches.
I go for my post-op appointment soon, and maybe I can get this awful ace wrap off. Today is the first day I've had any real pain, but I'm trying to avoid the percocets. I've only taken two so far.
Second day of full dose of Lexapro, at 10 mg. Still having nausea and lightheadedness. The hospital gave me an anti-nausea patch to deal with the anesthesia, which was very helpful with the lexapro, too, but it came off this morning.
I played some video games at the computer last night, which was good, but I think I overdid it, because my foot was really hurting by the time I went to bed. I think I should keep it elevated as much as possible, which means staying on the couch or in my recliner. I'll have to use my laptop again if I want to do any more long gaming sessions for right now.
Big D should be poking his head out of his office in a few minutes so we can get ready to go.
I go for my post-op appointment soon, and maybe I can get this awful ace wrap off. Today is the first day I've had any real pain, but I'm trying to avoid the percocets. I've only taken two so far.
Second day of full dose of Lexapro, at 10 mg. Still having nausea and lightheadedness. The hospital gave me an anti-nausea patch to deal with the anesthesia, which was very helpful with the lexapro, too, but it came off this morning.
I played some video games at the computer last night, which was good, but I think I overdid it, because my foot was really hurting by the time I went to bed. I think I should keep it elevated as much as possible, which means staying on the couch or in my recliner. I'll have to use my laptop again if I want to do any more long gaming sessions for right now.
Big D should be poking his head out of his office in a few minutes so we can get ready to go.
Friday, January 11, 2019
Last day at work before surgery
Stealing a bit of time at work, just because today is the first day this week that I've had any kind of down time. This week has been a nightmare of massive spike in volume and equipment failures left and right. Today is the first day this week that we haven't had some kind of equipment issue. Don't worry, there's still 3 hours left, plenty of time for something to break. It's been very stressful.
The new medication side effects aren't helping, either. Neither is my anxiety over my foot surgery on Monday.
Day 4 of Lexapro. Still have nausea, jittery, a little bit of lightheadedness, but it seems to be improving. I've had so much ginger this week that I can't imagine how I'm not sweating ginger crystals by now. But it really helps.
Foot surgery for the plantar fasciitis and heel spur happens on Monday. It's a minor surgery, but I'm really worried about how the recovery will go. I mean, it's my foot, it's not like I can do much if it gets fucked up. Kinda hard to move around without a proper weight bearing appendage.
Plus, I just am not sure how the whole "being home for 2 months" is going to impact things at home. Big D and I have been having a lot of communication issues and things aren't really that rosy right now. When I'm the one who does 98% of the emotional labor in the relationship and I'm having one of the worst depressive episodes I've EVER had, not surprising that things go a little haywire. I guess we'll just have to wait and see how things go. I'm still planning on going to IL to visit the crazy auntie for a few weeks, but even that depends on how my physical recovery is going.
So I'm just a queasy, dizzy ball of stress right now. Trying very hard to keep it contained and not lash out at people.
The new medication side effects aren't helping, either. Neither is my anxiety over my foot surgery on Monday.
Day 4 of Lexapro. Still have nausea, jittery, a little bit of lightheadedness, but it seems to be improving. I've had so much ginger this week that I can't imagine how I'm not sweating ginger crystals by now. But it really helps.
Foot surgery for the plantar fasciitis and heel spur happens on Monday. It's a minor surgery, but I'm really worried about how the recovery will go. I mean, it's my foot, it's not like I can do much if it gets fucked up. Kinda hard to move around without a proper weight bearing appendage.
Plus, I just am not sure how the whole "being home for 2 months" is going to impact things at home. Big D and I have been having a lot of communication issues and things aren't really that rosy right now. When I'm the one who does 98% of the emotional labor in the relationship and I'm having one of the worst depressive episodes I've EVER had, not surprising that things go a little haywire. I guess we'll just have to wait and see how things go. I'm still planning on going to IL to visit the crazy auntie for a few weeks, but even that depends on how my physical recovery is going.
So I'm just a queasy, dizzy ball of stress right now. Trying very hard to keep it contained and not lash out at people.
Thursday, January 10, 2019
Let's try this again, shall we?
I've missed having an online personal journal. For many reasons, but mostly because I seem to lose touch with myself if I don't. I've tried some phone journal apps a few times, but I just can't type fast enough on my phone to keep up with my thoughts. Not that I didn't ever post by phone to my old journal, but it wasn't the main source of entries.
Plus, I feel the need to have it online and potentially accessible to passers by. Not that I am under any delusions that what I feel the need to post will be beneficial or useful or even entertaining to anyone but myself. But if you are going to scream into the void, at least you should give the void the option to yell back.
So, some basics.
You can call me PokieDragon. I am female, white, early forties, short, fat, near-sighted. Used to be blonde, I think my hair color is called dirty blonde now? Not quite light brown, not quite blonde anymore. I have a small streak of white on my temple that I actually think looks kinda nifty.
That pretty much covers it, I think. I'm not really that interesting.
It's been a very rough time in my brain for the last 6 months or so. If I'm being honest, which I always try to be, especially with myself, these last few months have been the closest I've ever come to actively planning suicide. But I swore to myself a long time ago that I would never let my mother win. One reason I felt the need to resume journaling is so I can keep better track of my mental states. I find it very helpful to know what I was thinking and feeling at times.
So today is day two of my fourth antidepressant. In order, I have been on Prozac, Cymbalta, Wellbutrin, and now Lexapro. Prozac saved my life, probably quite literally, and it and Cymbalta worked well until they didn't. I switched to Wellbutrin almost exactly 2 years ago, and while it seemed to work ok, I never felt as good on it as I did the Cymbalta. Honestly, I probably should have stayed on cymbalta, but I think I panicked when I had some serious stress over a horrible job and had a fairly mild depressive episode. Cymbalta had worked so well for so long that I didn't know how to handle an episode like that. I found a new job shortly after, but was already on the Wellbutrin, so decided to leave well enough alone.
Yesterday I had VERY bad nausea, and didn't sleep that well. Today, I managed to keep most of the nausea at bay with some seriously strong ginger candy that I had gotten in Canada during my vacation this year. My Amazon order with more candy and some ginger tea, as well as some pepto-bismol tablets, came today, so hopefully I should be set for the nausea. If insomnia is going to be one of the initial side effects that I will have to deal with, I can try switching the time I take it around. I've been doing some reading on Lexapro, and it seems like it should work for me. It's the same class of drug as Prozac, and my new doctor says we can consider adding Cymbalta back in at a lower dose if it's necessary. I'm on a half dose for a week, then up to 10 mg, and we'll see how that does.
I think this is a pretty good start, and I'm tired, so it's time for bed.
Plus, I feel the need to have it online and potentially accessible to passers by. Not that I am under any delusions that what I feel the need to post will be beneficial or useful or even entertaining to anyone but myself. But if you are going to scream into the void, at least you should give the void the option to yell back.
So, some basics.
You can call me PokieDragon. I am female, white, early forties, short, fat, near-sighted. Used to be blonde, I think my hair color is called dirty blonde now? Not quite light brown, not quite blonde anymore. I have a small streak of white on my temple that I actually think looks kinda nifty.
That pretty much covers it, I think. I'm not really that interesting.
It's been a very rough time in my brain for the last 6 months or so. If I'm being honest, which I always try to be, especially with myself, these last few months have been the closest I've ever come to actively planning suicide. But I swore to myself a long time ago that I would never let my mother win. One reason I felt the need to resume journaling is so I can keep better track of my mental states. I find it very helpful to know what I was thinking and feeling at times.
So today is day two of my fourth antidepressant. In order, I have been on Prozac, Cymbalta, Wellbutrin, and now Lexapro. Prozac saved my life, probably quite literally, and it and Cymbalta worked well until they didn't. I switched to Wellbutrin almost exactly 2 years ago, and while it seemed to work ok, I never felt as good on it as I did the Cymbalta. Honestly, I probably should have stayed on cymbalta, but I think I panicked when I had some serious stress over a horrible job and had a fairly mild depressive episode. Cymbalta had worked so well for so long that I didn't know how to handle an episode like that. I found a new job shortly after, but was already on the Wellbutrin, so decided to leave well enough alone.
Yesterday I had VERY bad nausea, and didn't sleep that well. Today, I managed to keep most of the nausea at bay with some seriously strong ginger candy that I had gotten in Canada during my vacation this year. My Amazon order with more candy and some ginger tea, as well as some pepto-bismol tablets, came today, so hopefully I should be set for the nausea. If insomnia is going to be one of the initial side effects that I will have to deal with, I can try switching the time I take it around. I've been doing some reading on Lexapro, and it seems like it should work for me. It's the same class of drug as Prozac, and my new doctor says we can consider adding Cymbalta back in at a lower dose if it's necessary. I'm on a half dose for a week, then up to 10 mg, and we'll see how that does.
I think this is a pretty good start, and I'm tired, so it's time for bed.